money talks

I took a guilt beating yesterday when I went to my mom's. She really knows how to make me feel like crap about my life. She was right about one thing, though. I was almost too late to register for any useful classes. I scheduled today, it'll be ok... I think. I believe they're all writing intensive classes so I'm in for a busy quarter. Oh well, at least that's taken care of, one less worry. And I talked to Brad last night about how I was feeling. He was a friend to me and made me feel better. I knew he would. One reason why I'm so glad I have him to come home to after unpleasant things like that. He was a lover as well. Fuck the naysayers. He really is just what I need.
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Me: I just finished scheduling. I have all late afternoon, evening classes on Tuesday and Thursday. among them, Anthropology, Research Writing and Regional studies so I'm excited. Tuition is due August 17th. I added student health insurance so it's altogether about $2300. I'm still gonna try the fafsa. at the very least, I can reimburse you. Peace x.
Mom : hello
Me: you invisible
Me: ?
Mom : didn't mean to be
Mom : ok when can I come up and pay it
Me: I looked at my schedule for this coming week, but I don't remember my days off
Mom : well that was great
Mom : lol
Mom : let me know
Mom : I have Mon Tues and Wed off
Me: I have one or two of those off, I just don't remember which ones
Mom : I would like to do it next week
Me: ok
Me: I'm still gonna call the irs and try to finish my fafsa
Mom : k
Me: if it works, I should get your payment refunded and then I can give you back the money
Mom : whatever works for u
Mom : well I need to go to bed I have to work tomorrow
Mom : going to the fair tomorrow evening too
Mom : hey I'll catch ya later
Mom : ta ta
Me: ok
Me: night
Mom : nite
Mom 's status is now "nite nite". (7/28/2005 10:56 PM)
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I really don't want to take (or need in the first place, for that matter) my mom's money anymore. Is she maybe starting to get that? Does she realize I'm onto her and I don't wanna play the game anymore? As long as she's providing substantial financial assistance for anything, including school, it feels like she owns me and I am somehow under her control [to an extent]. I want this to stop. I want to stand on my own two feet. I want to stand up... to her. I'm almost 24 years old, I should be able to stand on my own.

-With Brad too, of course. At least he stills believes in me and doesn't bring me down. He stands by me :-)